1/21/11

I haven't left my bed today. The sadness is numbing and I have little desire to do anything but lay here. I don't know what to do without him; though I know this isn't what he would've wanted. I won't wake up tomorrow and have everything together again. That can't happen with his absence. I want to tell myself that he's in a better place, where he can now watch over me. That's what I want to tell myself. All that I'll hear, though, is that he's gone. He is gone. My grandfather is gone and I miss him. I miss him incredibly.